..while the significant other is taking his/her sweet time:
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Get cans of cat food and randomly put them in people’s carts when they don’t realize it.
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Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
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Make a trail of orange juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
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Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, “I think we’ve got a Code 3 in house wares,” and see what happens.
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Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to “10.”
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Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
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Put M&M’s on layaway.
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Move “Caution: Wet Floor” signs to carpeted areas.
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Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you’ll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
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When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, “Why won’t you people just leave me alone?”
