Guys, i've got tonnes of jokes lying around...i dunno whether to post 'em in individual threads or not..
So i'll try to bunch a few of them everytime i post...
JOKE 1
In heaven Einstein, Newton, Pascal and other great scientists
decided to play hide-n-seek.........
Unfortunately Einstein is the one who has the den...........He is
supposed to count upto 100...and then start searching.....Everyone
starts hiding except Newton.........
Newton just draws a square of 1 meter and stands in
itright in front of Einstein...........
Einstein's counting......97,98,99.....100........
He opens his eyes and finds Newton standing in
front........
Einstein says "newton's out..newton's....out....."
Newton denies and says i am not out........
He claims that he is not Newton......
All the scientists come out to see how he proves
that he is not
Newton..........
can u guess it?????
come on apply wht u studied in ur schools and college.
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
NO
SEE WHT NEWTON SAYS
Newton says "I am standing in a square of area 1m squared.....
That makes me Newton per meter squared......
since one Newton per meter squared is one Pascal,
I'm Pascal, Therefore Pascal is OUT !!!!!!!!"
JOKE 2
BRILLIANCE
One night four MBA students were boozing till late night and didn't study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.
In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty and weird as they could with grease and dirt.
Then they went up to the dean and said that they had gone to a wedding last night and on their return the tyre of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.
The Dean was a Just person so he said that you can have a retest after three days. After 3 days they said they were ready.
On the third day they appeared before the dean. The Dean said that as this was a special condition all four were required to be in separate rooms for the test.
They all agreed as they had prepared well in last three days.
The test consisted of two questions with total marks of 100.
Q1. Write down your Names. (2 marks)
Q2. Which tyre burst? (98 marks)
JOKE 3
There was this case in the hospital's Intensive care ward where
patients always died in the same bed and on Sunday morning at 11a.m.,
regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some
even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one
could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM.
So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to
go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents.
So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a.m., all
doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves
what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden
crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off evil........
Just when the clock struck 11.......
.
.
.
.
Santa Singh, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and
unplugged the life support system & plugged in the vacuum cleaner...
So i'll try to bunch a few of them everytime i post...
JOKE 1
In heaven Einstein, Newton, Pascal and other great scientists
decided to play hide-n-seek.........
Unfortunately Einstein is the one who has the den...........He is
supposed to count upto 100...and then start searching.....Everyone
starts hiding except Newton.........
Newton just draws a square of 1 meter and stands in
itright in front of Einstein...........
Einstein's counting......97,98,99.....100........
He opens his eyes and finds Newton standing in
front........
Einstein says "newton's out..newton's....out....."
Newton denies and says i am not out........
He claims that he is not Newton......
All the scientists come out to see how he proves
that he is not
Newton..........
can u guess it?????
come on apply wht u studied in ur schools and college.
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
NO
SEE WHT NEWTON SAYS
Newton says "I am standing in a square of area 1m squared.....
That makes me Newton per meter squared......
since one Newton per meter squared is one Pascal,
I'm Pascal, Therefore Pascal is OUT !!!!!!!!"
JOKE 2
BRILLIANCE
One night four MBA students were boozing till late night and didn't study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.
In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty and weird as they could with grease and dirt.
Then they went up to the dean and said that they had gone to a wedding last night and on their return the tyre of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.
The Dean was a Just person so he said that you can have a retest after three days. After 3 days they said they were ready.
On the third day they appeared before the dean. The Dean said that as this was a special condition all four were required to be in separate rooms for the test.
They all agreed as they had prepared well in last three days.
The test consisted of two questions with total marks of 100.
Q1. Write down your Names. (2 marks)
Q2. Which tyre burst? (98 marks)
JOKE 3
There was this case in the hospital's Intensive care ward where
patients always died in the same bed and on Sunday morning at 11a.m.,
regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some
even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one
could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM.
So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to
go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents.
So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a.m., all
doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves
what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden
crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off evil........
Just when the clock struck 11.......
.
.
.
.
Santa Singh, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and
unplugged the life support system & plugged in the vacuum cleaner...
hyeah:
:rofl: