Cant trust any Attorney

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An elderly retired Air Force pilot moved into a retirement community

where eligible men were at a premium.

After he had been there for a week, he went to confession and said "Bless me Father for I have sinned. Last week I was with seven different women."

The priest replied, "Take seven lemons, squeeze them into a glass and

drink the juice without pausing."

"Will that cleanse me of my sins, Father?" "No," said the priest "but it

will wipe that shit-eatin' grin off your face."
 
New exercise routine if you're close to 40 or over. You might want to take it easy at first, then do it faster as you become more proficient. It may be too strenuous for some.

Always consult your doctor before starting any exercise program!

SCROLL DOWN...

NOW SCROLL UP.....

That's enough for the first day. Have a beer.
 
PINOCCHIO had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about

splinters when they were having sex. Pinocchio, therefore, went to

visit Gepetto to see if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try a

little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away

enlightened. A couple weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing

happily through town and asked him, "How's the girlfriend?" Pinocchio

replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"
 
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