My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.
-Henny Youngman
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
-Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
-Milton Berle
I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There's water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied, "In the lake."
-Henny Youngman
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
-Henny Youngman
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replies, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
Wives are hard to figure out. They love lingerie. They love going to gargae sales. But they sure don't seem to like getting garage-sale lingerie as a gift.
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.
My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I went and got myself two girlfriends.
A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did.
Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
I found the neatest way to make my wife a more careful and defensive driver. I pointed out to her that if she's ever in an accident, the paper's gonna print her real age.
I've been in love with the same woman for48 years. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me.
I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. She said, "Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
:hap2:
-Henny Youngman
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
-Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
-Milton Berle
I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There's water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied, "In the lake."
-Henny Youngman
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
-Henny Youngman
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replies, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
Wives are hard to figure out. They love lingerie. They love going to gargae sales. But they sure don't seem to like getting garage-sale lingerie as a gift.
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.
My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I went and got myself two girlfriends.
A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did.
Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
I found the neatest way to make my wife a more careful and defensive driver. I pointed out to her that if she's ever in an accident, the paper's gonna print her real age.
I've been in love with the same woman for48 years. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me.
I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. She said, "Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
:hap2:
