Darth_Infernus
Contributor
/* TOP SECRET Code (c)Microsoft 1994-95
Project: Chicago(TM)
Projected release-date: Summer 1994, Spring 1995 */
#include <stdio.h>
#include <dos.h>
#include <conio.h>
#include "win31.h"
#include "evenmore.h"
#include "oldstuff.h"
#include "billrulz.h"
/* Reference: Internal memo #99281-95 from: William H. Gates III to: Executive Manager(s) for Chicago(TM) project
William H. Gates III wrote:
"I have serious doubts about the "EASY" install-definition. It might make customers think that they've got a _good_ product, possibly limiting sales of future Windows versions. Therefore I want the install-definition to be 'FRUSTRATING'.
Carry On,
Lord Bill"
*/
#define INSTALL = FRUSTRATING
void main()
{
while (!CRASH)
{
display_copyright_message();
display_bill_rules_message();
do_nothing_loop();
if(first_time_installation)
{
make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
do_nothing_loop();
totally_screw_HPFS_filesystem();
search_and_destroy_all_remains_of_OS/2();
hang_system();
}
write_something(anything);
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
do_some_stuff();
if(system_still_not_crashed)
{
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
basically_run_Windows_3.1();
perform_general_protection_fault();
do_nothing_loop();
display_BSOD();
do_nothing_loop();
do_nothing_loop();
}
}
/*Reference: Internal Memo #99683-95 from: Executive Managers - Chicago(TM) project to: William H. Gates III
Executive Managers Chicago(TM) project wrote:
"Dear Sir,
As we have found that this last piece of code within the 'if' statement (shown below) will never execute at all, we have decided to remove it in the final code in order to save at least another 5 megabytes of consumer disk space.
Thank you,
Executive Managers,
Project Chicago(TM)"
(The deleted code is as follows):
if(system_still_not_crashed)
{
write_cheer();
finished();
}
perform_general_protection_fault();
display_BSOD();
do_nothing_loop();
}
*/
<This joke can be found at various sites, I got it in an email, and I have adapted it to my liking, so this is not the original version>
Project: Chicago(TM)
Projected release-date: Summer 1994, Spring 1995 */
#include <stdio.h>
#include <dos.h>
#include <conio.h>
#include "win31.h"
#include "evenmore.h"
#include "oldstuff.h"
#include "billrulz.h"
/* Reference: Internal memo #99281-95 from: William H. Gates III to: Executive Manager(s) for Chicago(TM) project
William H. Gates III wrote:
"I have serious doubts about the "EASY" install-definition. It might make customers think that they've got a _good_ product, possibly limiting sales of future Windows versions. Therefore I want the install-definition to be 'FRUSTRATING'.
Carry On,
Lord Bill"
*/
#define INSTALL = FRUSTRATING
void main()
{
while (!CRASH)
{
display_copyright_message();
display_bill_rules_message();
do_nothing_loop();
if(first_time_installation)
{
make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
do_nothing_loop();
totally_screw_HPFS_filesystem();
search_and_destroy_all_remains_of_OS/2();
hang_system();
}
write_something(anything);
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
do_some_stuff();
if(system_still_not_crashed)
{
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
basically_run_Windows_3.1();
perform_general_protection_fault();
do_nothing_loop();
display_BSOD();
do_nothing_loop();
do_nothing_loop();
}
}
/*Reference: Internal Memo #99683-95 from: Executive Managers - Chicago(TM) project to: William H. Gates III
Executive Managers Chicago(TM) project wrote:
"Dear Sir,
As we have found that this last piece of code within the 'if' statement (shown below) will never execute at all, we have decided to remove it in the final code in order to save at least another 5 megabytes of consumer disk space.
Thank you,
Executive Managers,
Project Chicago(TM)"
(The deleted code is as follows):
if(system_still_not_crashed)
{
write_cheer();
finished();
}
perform_general_protection_fault();
display_BSOD();
do_nothing_loop();
}
*/
<This joke can be found at various sites, I got it in an email, and I have adapted it to my liking, so this is not the original version>
