Well when HL2 launched the condition in which steam was back then was horrifying compared to what steam has become now.
It has not given me too much trouble for quiet a while. For me paused update is working just fine, though i prefer my games being updated.
As someone said above, you can alway disable internet connection for 2 mins, start steam in offline mode. and play the games.
Best way to avoid huge delays is keep steam running that way it has chance to update itself when you might not be doing anything on pc.
I prefer steam these days.
Its classic I hate i - I love it scenario. You either love it, You either hate it, or you start loving it after some time.
I like the concept of having all my game collection managed by single piece of software.( Now you can even add non steam games to the steam list and use the Friends feature in any game ).
In the end, steam is must for valve online games. I prefer it for other games over popping in CD/DVD every time. ( And i prefer it over patched exes as well
).
For me steam is not optional. I have over 25games in my account. Soo I have learned to adapt to it
And trust me , its getting better and better over time.