Can't maintain moderation in gaming

[nightHawk12]

It's been nearly 8 years since I started PC gaming. I have always avoided studying and working to play games on either my phone or PC. I want to skip work and even if I don't play games I do useless stuff instead of working for a better life. Nobody can put that discipline into me. Today even if I don't play games I will scroll YouTube. How can I overcome this? I have tried to start a based system but can't enforce it. I don't feel good after this Mr.Stark.

 

[Renegade]

Oh well.. play as much games as you want, scroll as much youtube as you want.

Just do one small thing:

1. Decide a goal that you want to achieve 6 months from now
2. Break it down into small chunks (ask chatgpt to break it down into small chunks for you)
3. Spend only 30 uninterrupted, distraction free minutes on it every single day
4. Do anything else for the entire day but don't skip this one thing of 30 minutes.
5. After a month, increase this to two sessions of 30 minutes each.
6. Don't rush this otherwise you will relapse. Make only this incremental change.

 

[lockhrt999]

Today's games have become addictive af. They all entice your dopamine--the hormone of addiction. As per one research paper, some games release as much dopamine as cocaine. It's all the same for body and mind.

Gaming in moderation is very much like doing cocaine in moderation. It'll require you to waste an immense amount of will power, that will power you may want to save for your job/studies. The simpler thing is not doing it at all. You won't be missing anything.

I was in your place a long time ago.

 

[Tracer_Bullet]

Today's games have become addictive af. They all entice your dopamine--the hormone of addiction. As per one research paper, some games release as much dopamine as cocaine. It's all the same for body and mind.

Gaming in moderation is very much like doing cocaine in moderation. It'll require you to waste an immense amount of will power, that will power you may want to save for your job/studies. The simpler thing is not doing it at all. You won't be missing anything.

I was in your place a long time ago.

I play games and am not addicted to them, certainly not continuously. I have been in past to some extent ( used to play more in school days..), but nothing like cocaine. That shit has withdrawal issues, no ?
I work on my own, so this type of addiction would cause problems, but it doesn't for me. Some days i play more, other days i work more.

Maybe it might depend on type of games, competitive MP perhaps, and things that can get you into flow state - so for now i stay away from strategy/4x/factory type games. But still, i don't think this ever got out of hand for me.

So, op - maybe also try to change the type of games you play and reduce time given to extremely addictive ones. Play more story based games, or keep changing the type of games. Play games that have an ending.

Also, this article showed up in firefox -

https://www.hindustantimes.com/lifestyle/health/gaming-addiction-heres-how-mindfulness-meditation-might-help-break-the-cycle-101735379422444.html

 

[lockhrt999]

I play games and am not addicted to them, certainly not continuously. I have been in past to some extent ( used to play more in school days..), but nothing like cocaine. That shit has withdrawal issues, no ?

That's great, man. The last game I played was GTA5. The game was so addictive for me that I completed that game at a blazing 15FPS on an Intel Pentium processor. I'm not proud.

Any instant gratifying thing that we do will have withdrawals, yes. It'll be something like unable to focus on mundane work/study stuff for a longer duration.

 

[Tracer_Bullet]

The last game I played was GTA5. The game was so addictive for me that I completed that game at a blazing 15FPS on an Intel Pentium processor. I'm not proud.

hehe, i remember playing Crysis 1 more than a decade ago on my laptop with mid 20s FPS. That game was so good. But this doesn't mean you are addicted.
One can be addicted to watching movies too i guess then. As long as i am able to work and do other things, then game time is good for me.
Same as watching movies / TV shows. I cant work all the time for months, also i cant play all time in same way - that gets boring too eventually.

Dunno, maybe differs from person to person.

 

[Renegade]

Its not so much addiction but could be so many other things like mild depression, self esteem, and procrastination. Those will also cause you to dissociate yourself from the real world. Put off things you know you should but just can't get started.

You will look to keep yourself engaged in any easy outlet, gaming could be one if you are already into it. For others it could be binge watching. Its difficult to get out of but have to make small consistent efforts.

Meditation, exercise, meeting new people, self affirmations could be useful for some. We don't know what baggage the person sitting next to you everyday might be carrying.

 

[nightHawk12]

Oh well.. play as much games as you want, scroll as much youtube as you want.

Just do one small thing:

1. Decide a goal that you want to achieve 6 months from now
2. Break it down into small chunks (ask chatgpt to break it down into small chunks for you)
3. Spend only 30 uninterrupted, distraction free minutes on it every single day
4. Do anything else for the entire day but don't skip this one thing of 30 minutes.
5. After a month, increase this to two sessions of 30 minutes each.
6. Don't rush this otherwise you will relapse. Make only this incremental change.

Hi, i appreciate the response.
The things which I want to accomplish require 3hours of uninterrupted attention per day and I have 8h of office 5 days a week. I am finding it hard to believe that 30minutes would be enough for these goals. I have loads of backlogs in my office too because of the same procrastination issue.

That's great, man. The last game I played was GTA5. The game was so addictive for me that I completed that game at a blazing 15FPS on an Intel Pentium processor. I'm not proud.

Any instant gratifying thing that we do will have withdrawals, yes. It'll be something like unable to focus on mundane work/study stuff for a longer duration.

I don't know what to call it. i have reduced multiplayer games nowadays, used to play like 10h per day a few months ago. But even the single player games I play I like them to be easy if they are too difficult like moto GP or elden ring then I don't like playing them. I feel I play them to just avoid my work and responsibility not out of sheer interest. When I play games it doesn't gives me a sense of achievement( atleast not the same as finishing a DIY project or getting a better paying job) and I feel guilty afterwards.
.

 

[PunkX 75]

Today's games have become addictive af. They all entice your dopamine--the hormone of addiction. As per one research paper, some games release as much dopamine as cocaine. It's all the same for body and mind.

Gaming in moderation is very much like doing cocaine in moderation. It'll require you to waste an immense amount of will power, that will power you may want to save for your job/studies. The simpler thing is not doing it at all. You won't be missing anything.

I was in your place a long time ago.

It's all about self-discipline. I've been gaming since the age of 9, and I still do at 32. I work on critical projects from home, 5 days a week. Put in 2 hours of gaming, everyday, without it affecting my productivity.

Agree with the moderation part, that rule applies to all forms of dopamine-inducing activities.

@nightHawk12 my take is that you aren't addicted, it's more of an easy blame-game here for some other conflicting internal thought that you aren't addressing, leading to procrastination.

 

[lockhrt999]

I feel I play them to just avoid my work and responsibility not out of sheer interest.

That's what I said. You want something with instant gratification. Procrastination is given.

I'll suggest you delete all the games and accounts. Go cold turkey. Stop consuming gaming videos, news as well. Bring your dopamine baseline so low that even the work will become enjoyable. At one point, you'll see that life itself is a game, and you are competing with your friends, colleagues for success, money etc.

For work and procrastination, add the accountability factor in. There are many accountability platforms available online. Use one. Keep the stakes high. It'll work something like if you don't achieve your work goal, you will lose, say, 10,000 INR. It'll put a full stop to the procrastination.

To keep yourself focussed on the work, you can use focusmate. It costs $10 a month but man, that's penny's considering how much productivity boost you get from it.

 

[Dhanush]

I used to be an avid gamer, but I realized it was affecting my life negatively. So, I replaced it with outdoor activities and socializing with friends. At first, it was tough, but I kept trying.

Here's what I learned:

• Start small
• Find alternative activities
• Surround yourself with support
• Be patient

Remember, failure is not the end. Not trying is. Keep pushing forward and you'll overcome your addiction.

 

[logistopath]

So, op - maybe also try to change the type of games you play and reduce time given to extremely addictive ones.

This has worked for me. I keep track of how much time I spend on each app per day using the screen time tool in ios, and uninstall any game that takes more than 30 mins each day. The screen time limits option also helps keep the time spent on individual apps in check.

 

[lockhrt999]

I used to be an avid gamer, but I realized it was affecting my life negatively. So, I replaced it with outdoor activities and socializing with friends.

This was my other reason to quit gaming.

 

[PunkX 75]

This was my other reason to quit gaming.

Your story is one of the main reasons I avoid MP games (especially ones like CS/Valo). I stick to single-player titles only and am very specific about which ones.

 

[Renegade]

Hi, i appreciate the response.
The things which I want to accomplish require 3hours of uninterrupted attention per day and I have 8h of office 5 days a week. I am finding it hard to believe that 30minutes would be enough for these goals. I have loads of backlogs in my office too because of the same procrastination issue.

You are looking at 3 hours that you think you need, wondering where will you get it from and feeling overwhelmed. You are setting unrealistic targets, giving up and in the process missing out on even 30 minutes.

You feel this way right now but these small chunks have a way of adding up and growing exponentially. Start what I suggested, do it religiously and you will thank me only 3 months from now.

Do the same in office. Just pick one most important thing to do each day, put dedicated half an hour to it. Do that first thing in the morning and call it a successful day. Rest you continue with your day as you do now.

See this poster that I had got printed for myself and keep it at my desk. Read the caption at the bottom. The point is, even 1% extra effort everyday adds up if you are consistent. Don't set unrealistic targets, set a process, goals are a byproduct.

 

[nightHawk12]

You are looking at 3 hours that you think you need, wondering where will you get it from and feeling overwhelmed. You are setting unrealistic targets, giving up and in the process missing out on even 30 minutes.

You feel this way right now but these small chunks have a way of adding up and growing exponentially. Start what I suggested, do it religiously and you will thank me only 3 months from now.

Do the same in office. Just pick one most important thing to do each day, put dedicated half an hour to it. Do that first thing in the morning and call it a successful day. Rest you continue with your day as you do now.

See this poster that I had got printed for myself and keep it at my desk. Read the caption at the bottom. The point is, even 1% extra effort everyday adds up if you are consistent. Don't set unrealistic targets, set a process, goals are a byproduct.

Ok I will try this for my upskill and workout goals. But for office 30mins and then relax will get me fired within a month lol, suppose I have 4 things pending for the day. Should I give 30mins to each of them and then call it a day?

 

[Renegade]

Ok I will try this for my upskill and workout goals. But for office 30mins and then relax will get me fired within a month lol, suppose I have 4 things pending for the day. Should I give 30mins to each of them and then call it a day?

Haha.. I am not saying relax. I am saying go about your day after that as you d now. But yes, if you can give each of them half an hour each without distractions then you will on your way to mental peace.