Some hilarious quotes :
Passed out, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them."
If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".
Jack Bauer can break anyone and anything, but he will always break the protocol first.
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
The only reason the Chinese kept Jack alive is so that he could bring down the population.
If Jack Bauer's gun jams, it's because he wanted to beat you with it.
When someone asks him how his day is going, Jack replies, "Previously, on 24..."
Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. Jack Bauer laughs at Superman for having a weakness.
There is the right way, the wrong way, and the Jack Bauer way. It's basically the right way but faster and more deaths.
In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the **** have you done with your life?
Jack Bauer arm once wrestled Superman. The stipulations were the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Jack Bauer doesn't speak any foreign languages, but he can make any foreigner speak English in a matter of minutes.
Don't ever ask Jack Bauer what is going on. He'll explain in the car.
When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.
Jack Bauer teaches a course at Harvard entitled: "Time Management: Making the Most Out Of Each Day."
Jack Bauer went out to the desert, and was bitten by a rattlesnake. The snake died.
Jesus died and rose from the dead in 3 days. It took Jack Bauer less than an hour. And he's done it twice.
Just a few filtered out good ones from over 300 on a site I was forwarded.
Passed out, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them."
If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".
Jack Bauer can break anyone and anything, but he will always break the protocol first.
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
The only reason the Chinese kept Jack alive is so that he could bring down the population.
If Jack Bauer's gun jams, it's because he wanted to beat you with it.
When someone asks him how his day is going, Jack replies, "Previously, on 24..."
Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. Jack Bauer laughs at Superman for having a weakness.
There is the right way, the wrong way, and the Jack Bauer way. It's basically the right way but faster and more deaths.
In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the **** have you done with your life?
Jack Bauer arm once wrestled Superman. The stipulations were the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Jack Bauer doesn't speak any foreign languages, but he can make any foreigner speak English in a matter of minutes.
Don't ever ask Jack Bauer what is going on. He'll explain in the car.
When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.
Jack Bauer teaches a course at Harvard entitled: "Time Management: Making the Most Out Of Each Day."
Jack Bauer went out to the desert, and was bitten by a rattlesnake. The snake died.
Jesus died and rose from the dead in 3 days. It took Jack Bauer less than an hour. And he's done it twice.
Just a few filtered out good ones from over 300 on a site I was forwarded.
