What's sucess in life? Are you an underachiever like me?

red dragon

red dragon

Justiceforall
Skilled
I had a long conversation with an old schoolmate after decades..he was a very good friend and we were room mates for years, he was a brilliant student and stood second in IIT.
Presently he works with Amazon ( very highly placed) and earns a massive salary . Absolutely massive.
This guy is a straight shooter and told me point blank that I'm earning a lot less considering the number of years I've spent studying and accumulating degrees...one after another...and he's very true..if money is the prime/ only yardstick of success, I'm a failure.
Doctors with just a single post graduation degree/ often even a diploma earns a lot more than me.
Even my sister who's a radiologist ( only MD) earns a lot more than me.
But given our lifestyle, we don't need more money, we get by comfortably and I sincerely believe my work helps people in need. But this underachiever tag is not a pleasant thing.
Any of you here feel this way or being called an underachiever?
 
When we start comparing ourselves with others, we will always feel underachiever and what not. Ultimately, if you are happy / content, nothing of that sort matters. But yes it is super duper difficult to not let that affect you. As human nature is, one gets affected seeing others more successful and earning more in same field of work.
 
raksrules said:
When we start comparing ourselves with others, we will always feel underachiever and what not. Ultimately, if you are happy / content, nothing of that sort matters. But yes it is super duper difficult to not let that affect you. As human nature is, one gets affected seeing others more successful and earning more in same field of work.
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You have portrayed this so aptly and simply. Totally agree!

How about a yardstick for success on how successful we are in adhering to what raks said? Basically getting a 7 on raks scale :p means quite successful in being content
 
Yes, I"m an underachiever and not afraid or ashamed agreeing on it. I'm a damn human eod!
My so called old pals are enjoying settled lives etc. with deep pocket earnings and swanky bmw audi cars. But I don't compare at all as they have opted for their own carriers either by choice or force but it has paid them off very well eod. Thats what matters.
I opted for my own decisions and seems to pay the price but no logic complaining or otherwise. I can still flourish if I take those extra efforts and zeal but too lazy as stress and burdens have killed me from inside... just taking life and day as it comes..

Have wasted few yrs here and there behind some hopeless useless people as well who are now doing really great... my help and benefits yielded them a golden life and I'm still where I was yrs ago. No regrets though!

To conclude, success was very struggling for me since childhood, just my stars to be blamed. So 100% effort gives me 20% fruits even today. Pundits and astros always suggested me to take it easy as success is there but late... But I want it now as I feel its already too late... Whats the point if I get success when I"m laying on some bed around 70s awaiting end of life??

Working towards achieving success.. the run continues...
 
For all of us, there's somebody doing far better, and then there's somebody who's doing far worse too.
I was into this comparison rabbit hole many years ago, but one day made peace with what I have, and what I'll possibly achieve.
The most important parameter is being happy - be it on a salary of 10k a month or 1000k a month. I earn quite a bit less compared to many people in a similar profile, and I've had instances where people have told me this point blank (when referring me for a job), but eventually what makes me happy is with my current role, I get to spend quite a lot of time with my family - my parents, my wife, my kids. I get to talk, play, make food, just be with them, abs going for a traditional office based job shudders me.
What also motivates me is that I can share my life learnings, dos and don'ts, with my kids, enriching their lives, trying to make them better than mine.
I'm pretty sure I won't be able to afford a big house or a BMW or a Merc in my life, but as long as you're content, a Maruti or a Santro will do.
I sincerely try to follow this, and I believe (and hope) I'm getting better at it every year.
Also, if somebody is dissing me just for my salary, well, **** them. No need to be friends. Once you've a family, you realise life is more than running around for money. Yes, you need money, but you need your loved ones more.
 
I'm not exactly underpaid or anything...IMO somewhat overpaid ( due to tax benefits) But it's nothing compared to a top level Apple/ Amazon employee.
Yes, of course I could earn a lot more in clinical practice...but I hate the toxic work culture of corporate hospital...I'm much more happy vaccinating African tribal kids, cleaning ulcers of drug addicts, sharing my story of recovery ...travel around...I sincerely feel I'm doing something good...but may be these are nothing...but I want to believe and live in this lie...once in a while when someone calls/ emails that they are doing well after quitting drugs...it all feels worthy...may be I'm an idiot, but I will remain this sad/ happy idiot..
 
red dragon said:
I'm not exactly underpaid or anything...IMO somewhat overpaid ( due to tax benefits) But it's nothing compared to a top level Apple/ Amazon employee.
Yes, of course I could earn a lot more in clinical practice...but I hate the toxic work culture of corporate hospital...I'm much more happy vaccinating African tribal kids, cleaning ulcers of drug addicts, sharing my story of recovery ...travel around...I sincerely feel I'm doing something good...but may be these are nothing...but I want to believe and live in this lie...once in a while when someone calls/ emails that they are doing well after quitting drugs...it all feels worthy...may be I'm an idiot, but I will remain this sad/ happy idiot..
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It's worth it, man.

I still remember the days of MSF, possibly the best and most productive work I ever did. And the stories I have are better than any corporate stories of getting a client or earning XYZ amount of money. You need to enrich your soul more than your pocket.
 
Money should not be the only yardstick to measure success. We exchange time for money but in the grand scheme of things even infinite amount of money cannot buy you even a second of time.

So while, we should go for it but it should not be the only endeavor in life and we should try to balance things out. The top level execs with those insane salaries.. I hope they did equally well in other aspects of life.
 
Money really matters in todays world...look at the inflation, shooting prices everyday. So not the only yardstick to measure but definitely the most important ones.
Gone is the era of love matters money doesn't and all. Propose a girl, marry someone, if you are not financially stable, you are fired from the relationship.
 
Yes, money is extremely important...but I just can't motivate myself to live in one city forever to make money working as consultant at 2-3 big hospitals...that's the easiest way to make a lot of money for me.
I will just die out of boredom.
 
The flame that stops burning is the flame everyone then blames... o one bothers or cares why it stopped burning why it left its journey incomplete..
 
If you are happy with your job and your wife,
AND your employer is happy with your and your wife is also happy with you,
trust me, you don't need anything else.

If you are able to raise your kids in your own care and they are doing the way you want them to,
you are one of very few who have this opportunity.

If you get to see places and receiving gratitudes from all kinds of people,
you are the blessed one.

If you have achieved an honest life that makes you proud of what you do,
you are an achiever.


Do you think those `achievers` can match you?
 
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