Where is our gratitude list thread?

[red dragon]

Yes, there are, but wanted to join new groups. Know almost everyone in Kolkata NA/AA circle.
You read the stories right? Amazing, nah?
Great to know that you're neither ashamed or afraid to speak about recovery in an open forum like TE.
Some guy in TE mocked by calling " resident Kabir Singh" as I also don't live in India, didn't know anything about the movie.
After reading it ( about the movie)...felt kind of hurt. I literally blew away more than half of life's savings in India's Covid crisis.
But it's okay....he doesn't know the pain of addiction ( or the joy of recovery)

 

[chiron]

I think a lot of people have misconceptions about what 12 step is about (myself included in the past), and view sobriety and moderation as an act of self will and strength of character. And I know plenty of people who live bitter and resentful lives without having ever tried any mind altering stuff.

 

[red dragon]

Self will and strength of mind represent just the opposite of the entire 12 step program!!
It's all about surrendering and accepting defeat...and moving forward from there till spiritual awakening.

 

[NotMyRealName]

Not addressing anyone above in particular, but i'm an incredibly focussed and confident person when i want to be, and usually end up achieving the tasks that i'm hell-bent on, even surprising people who expected the complete opposite. Unfortunately, this is very rare, because i'm also incredibly risk-averse (because of certain events in my past) and it's not fear of failure exactly but lack of confidence. There's possibly also a generous amount of laziness thrown in.

Back to the point, if I had the will-power and determination to do xyz task in the first place, which i'm instead trying to get support from a friend/group/god from, i wouldn't even be having a conversation about it, i would have done it already. So i believe willpower and determination are moot points when advising someone struggling. And yes, those two things need to be eventually achieved to exit the rut.

There's this very common saying which REALLY infuriates me, 'god helps those who help themselves'. If you can help yourself, then why do you need god for? God helps the helpless, or so i would like to believe...

This is personal opinion, and i may be completely wrong, so anyone please don't be offended.

 

[red dragon]

We will have a deep discussion about it.
There must be people who did successfully quit drugs/ alcohol with willpower and determination.
But myself and thousands of others I know couldn't. In fact the will power and determination helped me immensely to continue my usage under any circumstances.
It's highly possible I lack sufficient determination and willpower.
You know what was the worst part of addiction? I was fully aware of the consequences, and could feel that everyday, yet couldn't stop. And first I played the victim card then self pity...at that time didn't even know why truly I started.
I was a good student, got through IIT/ JEE ( both medical and engineering) without any problem, passed MBBS with two gold medals and full scholarship..and then boom!! Straight to H from cigarettes ( I possibly am the only addict who tried H and morphine before alcohol, pot)
It's now feels almost funny that I did first 2 years of the first MD being high all the time, nodding off during classes, getting minor ODs during night duties. Nobody couldn't even think in their wildest dreams, of all people, I was using drugs..even my close friends thought I'm finally getting mellow with age, getting matured and whatnot!!
Anyway it all came out after the first OD, but nothing changed for me, got high the same evening I was discharged.
Anyway, it took 3/4 ODs to make me finally SURRENDER 3 yeasrs AFTER getting clean.
Those 3 years of abstinence were the hardest in my life. I was only using will power to abstain and it was a long nightmare ( as somehow I made myself to think I'm too educated to attend NA meetings, too good to interact with NA members)
A guy called Sandy one day showed up at the hospital...he convinced me to surrender and seek help from fellow addicts in recovery in the wonderful program.