Would you shift out of India if you had an option ?

raksrules said:
Has anyone factored in "Upbringing of Children" in this equation ?

Frankly, this is the only one thing that scares me the most. :unsure:
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I think that if you feel that you will be able to bring up your child the same way as you would here in India, that would be a big mistake. And it will totally be unfair on the child too. But, even then I feel a balance can be achieved. Good values can be passed on to kids no matter where you stay.

Made me think of this video I saw sometime back -


Good values and super polite. Even when the reporter interrupts him at 4:47, he apologises to her. She apologises right back saying "Forgive me for interrupting".

If you are thinking on the lines of arranged marriage vs love marriage, I think that is quite a trivial aspect that you shouldn't worry about right now. Things can go wrong in any situation. :)
 
@Sei

No arranged marriage vs love marriage is the last thing in mind and i frankly don't care about that for now. What concerns me more is the general upbringing of the child. Although a parent may try whatever is in their power to inculcate good values but the child will go to schools and outside and may take the bad parts (true for India as well). Moreover one cannot be very strict with their child (as they do in India) which i believe can sometimes further aggravate the problem. The child protection and such comes in.
I have myself seen a case of my neighbors here who are settled in USA, the mom had to be on house arrest for quite a few months because of the complain from her daughter (then 7-10 years).
I and my wife are ready to settle if we get a chance but this children part is the most concerning at the moment. Rest all can me managed.
There is a large part in me believes that raising a child in India is still better.
 
I was born and brought up in the middle-east, and moved to india permanently after 15 years. Its the small "vacations" in India every few years in those 15 years that kept me grounded.
Plus the middle-east is full of Indians, so I developed a sense of Indianness (with a neutral accent).

The problem with bringing up kids abroad is making them accept India, and their connection with India. Realization that poverty, pollution, corruption exist here, and one has to bear with it (but try to build up their morals properly) cannot be drilled into them, but shown to them indirectly.

Nowadays I see kids in Indian malls with US accents cribbing loudly about how they get better Subs in the US.
I blame the parents completely for bringing up their kids abroad with a better view of that country than our own, even though ours has so much more to offer.

Personally, i'd move love to move abroad, live a slightly tension-free life, earn as much as possible by the time i have kids turning 5-6, then come back to India.
Reasons:
a) India is India. (I guess most people would get this)
b) We get almost everything "foreign" in our metros, (imports).
c) If one has enough money, getting a nice bungalow, a nice car.. then being insulated from the problems of India is very easy.
d) If kids were live in a foreign country for 18+ years, they'll be tempted to settle there, and i/(future)wifey will have to return to india without them, and remain alone.
 
Vince said:
Personally, i'd move love to move abroad, live a slightly tension-free life, earn as much as possible by the time i have kids turning 5-6, then come back to India.
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This is the exact same point where i am stuck. Assuming i get a chance till what age of kid (no kid yet :) ) should one stay in the USA and then return. I know people say it is difficult to return and everything but if i am adamant on returning after few years then i will for sure. I am just not sure what is the right age (for kid) to get back to India as i would definitely want schooling to be done here instead of other country. If he/she wants to go for higher studies later abroad that is fine.
 
Vince said:
...
d) If kids were live in a foreign country for 18+ years, they'll be tempted to settle there, and i/(future)wifey will have to return to india without them, and remain alone.
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I'm just curious, have you thought the time you'll spend in the other country till your kids are 18, your parents are already alone that whole time in India ?

It is really a very complex topic, especially from the family and friends point of view rather than the culture.
 
sabby said:
I'm just curious, have you thought the time you'll spend in the other country till your kids are 18, your parents are already alone that whole time in India ?

It is really a very complex topic, especially from the family and friends point of view rather than the culture.
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True that. If your parents go with you things are ok but if then then it can turn very very complex. I visited my uncle this weekend and they told me there is a lady staying downstairs who has her lunch and dinner is a neighbor's flat, that lady is 86 years old and she lives all alone because her sons are in US.
 
If we are talking different scenarios here then I think the discussion will be beyond the scope of the forum.

One thing is for certain. A developed country is better than a developing nation, no matter the factors used in comparison.

But the standards of "being better" may still not include many factors such as stress levels, social health, family etc...
 
Nice topic!
Personally,if UK-Hell!No!!
If country like Netherlands/Sweden/Norway-Yes,may be.
Japan-Hell!Yes!!
US-Have not figured out yet,such a huuge country!
Unfortunately my work drives me around the world every year and I find Japan to be the best for Indians!
 
Here is an example from someone I know -

Both of there sons were born in UK. For their upbringing they shifted back to India once the older son was 6. They remained in India till both sons had cleared their 12th exam and now they have shifted their base back to UK.
According to them, this was something they couldn't have taken a chance with. There kids could have turned out as good as they are now had they been brought up in the UK as well, but they were sure that over here it was much better with the kids grandparents and cousins around.
I concur with them. I would love to go and settle too, just because I love cars, bikes and fast internet.
Apart from these 3 things I don't care for anything they have to offer.

So for me it doesn't make much sense. I will go for a visit and rent the Lambos and Bugattis and I know that would be enough for me. These days anything new only excites me for a week at max anyway, be it some piece of tech or a new car.

But that is my point of view now since I have never been abroad. Who knows what I might say once I have spent some time there.
 
I'm curious too. My manager in my previous company said that Japan was the worst of the places he visited ( including a lot). He especially said that the food was horrible.
 
sabby said:
I'm just curious, have you thought the time you'll spend in the other country till your kids are 18, your parents are already alone that whole time in India ?

It is really a very complex topic, especially from the family and friends point of view rather than the culture.
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Good point there sabby. But that changes from person to person. For the youth of 70s/80s in India who managed to migrate abroad, they usually had more siblings (i'm talking from personal experience, my parents were from small towns), and there was always someone to take care of parents. (But eventually all my dad's siblings moved on and one grandmother passed away all alone in her village.).
Now lets look at our generation who are between 20 and 40 years old. There are usually 2 siblings. If one is a girl, you can most probably forget about her taking parents into her new home after marriage. If one sibling is ambitious career-wise, he/she will push the parents onto the other sibling (except when it comes to asset disbursement during inheritance).
Endless threads of scenarios. :(


That is another reason why I mentioned that I would prefer to stay abroad till kids are 5-6. NOT 18. Because no matter how you judge the Joneses on how they take care of their parents, I'd like to be around for my mum.

I think Sarath has given a good thought below:

Sarath_ said:
If we are talking different scenarios here then I think the discussion will be beyond the scope of the forum.
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We have to understand the general views and realities, then tailor that to our personal life scenario.


Also "where exactly" one would want to shift to also makes a big impact. USA/Netherlands/Timbucktoo may be nice and fancy, but if you have family in India you'd like to come back to for regular visits (again, this varies from person to person), a foreign country close to home is the best bet.
Factor in your career, and the obvious choices pop-out at you. For construction, FMCG, etc: the middle east. For IT, Finance: Singapore, Malaysia, HK
 
Japan is one of the best countries for Indians. Know tonnes of people there. Personally didnt go there, Quit the company right before the slot. :)
 
Japan mein aaisa kya hai ?? Someone please explain.
Is it because of the availability of transport and city life that one is used to in India ?
 
Personally I like their culture,they are mostly quiet,honest and do not suffer from superiority complex like the British.
I almost felt like home there,food can be difficult,but definitely tolerable and some
are actually very good(Being a Bengali,rice and seafood is not too bad)
There are many other reasons too!
 
Heard that Govt is goint to increase taxes for individuals who earn more than 10lakhs...to 40 to 45%...

this is ridiculous..i cant tolerate this and i am not ready to pay my hard earned money to some corrupted politician or someone sitting home lazy...

and i am against reservations on caste based system, but reservation should be there for economically background..after all these nonsense..my kids need to struggle to get above 90% to get placement in IITs or i need to get ready to loot any bank to pay these corporate collages...no offense..just my view on Future India.
 
jhonny.s said:
Heard that Govt is goint to increase taxes for individuals who earn more than 10lakhs...to 40 to 40%...

this is ridiculous..i cant tolerate this and i am not ready to pay my hard earned money to some corrupted politician or someone sitting home lazy...

and i am against reservations on caste based system, but reservation should be there for economically background..after all these nonsense..my kids need to struggle to get above 90% to get placement in IITs or i need to get ready to loot any bank to pay these corporate collages...no offense..just my view on Future India.
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Yes i see a similar future unfortunately and worried that in the way this caste and reservation system is encroaching everywhere, the next generation (the general category people) will have to do with sub standard places for education and even jobs probably.
 
raksrules said:
Yes i see a similar future unfortunately and worried that in the way this caste and reservation system is encroaching everywhere, the next generation (the general category people) will have to do with sub standard places for education and even jobs probably.
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this indian system is killing my hopes and forcing me think for a meeting with immigration agent.
 
My younger brother who has been to US for 6 months is dying to go back to either US or Canada as he feels his job (Hotel Management) will have better opportunities abroad. But for his case it is not that simple that some employer will apply an H1 for him and call him. It probably does not work as easily as it works in IT industry (i feel).
 
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