Cant trust any Attorney

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hmasalia

Forerunner
A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper has cheated him out
of ten million bucks. His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he
got the job in the first place. It was assumed that a deaf
bookkeeper would not hear anything that he might have to testify about
in court.

When the Godfather goes to confront the bookkeeper about his missing
10 million, he brings along his attorney, who knows sign language.

The Godfather tells the lawyer, "Ask him where the 10 million bucks
he embezzled from me is." The attorney, using sign language, asks
the bookkeeper where the money is.

The bookkeeper signs back: "I don't know what you are talking about."

The attorney tells the Godfather: "He says he doesn't know what you 're
talking about." The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to the
bookkeeper's temple and says, "Ask him again!"

The attorney signs to the bookkeeper: "He'll kill you if you don't
tell him!"

The bookkeeper signs back: "OK! You win! The money is in a brown
briefcase, buried behind the shed in my cousin Enzo's backyard in
Queens!"

The Godfather asks the attorney: "Well, what'd he say?" The
attorney replies: "He says you don't have the balls to pull the trigger."
__________________
 
YOUR DRIVERS LICENSE TELLS IT ALL

A mother is driving her little girl to a friend's house for a play date.

"Mommy," the little girl asks, "how old are you?"

"Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother replied. "It's not polite."

"OK", the little girl says, "How much do you weigh?"

"Now really," the mother says, "those are personal questions and are really
none of your business."

Undaunted, the little girl asks, "Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?"

"That is enough questions, young lady, honestly!"

The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play.

"My Mom won't tell me anything about her," the little girl says to her friend.

"Well," says the friend, "all you need to do is look at her drivers license.
It is like a report card, it has everything on it."

Later that night the little girl says to her mother, "I know how old you are, you are 32."

The mother is surprised and asks, "How did you find that out?

"I also know that you weigh 140 pounds."

The mother is past surprised and shocked now. "How in heaven's name did you find that out?"

"And," the little girl says triumphantly, "I know why you and daddy got a divorce."

"Oh really?" the mother asks. "Why?"

"Because you got an F in sex."
 
What happens when you:

1) have nothing to do

2) own a sharp knife

3) have a large lime

4) own a patient cat

5) drink too much tequila

6) and it's football season?

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?

(P.S No Offence to anyone I know on TE)

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U r So dead .. just like a dodo ..
HE IS A MOD ... and goin by the way of some mods here, u know what u can get... and it aint gonna be Fresh LimeSoda buddy .. :)
 
Darthcoder said:
WTF man, put a NSFW Warning atleast dammit.
I just opened that a$$ ad in front of 4 female colleagues.

I presume your female colleagues are adults , quit the unconventional thinking :|

Nice pics , posted on fe :P
 
Bluffmaster said:
I presume your female colleagues are adults , quit the unconventional thinking :|

Nice pics , posted on fe :P

LOL, Understand man!!
Watching a$$ pics in front of em isnt good, you'll understand when u begin working.

@sunilyo: LOL, Am acting as if it never happened, to avoid the embarrassment :ashamed:
 
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